If we don’t know it already, chances are we’re not interested in learning it.
If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget you book.
If you can survive death, you can probably survive anything.
Ill-bred children are always displaying their pest manners.
In 20 years there will be radio stations playing classic rap.
In life’s rat race, it’s not how fast you can run but how good you deal with the cats that matters.
In life’s wallet, there’s no compartment for change.
In spite of the cost of living, it’s still popular.
In theory, everything works.
In today’s world, anyone who is not confused just isn’t thinking straight.
Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out.
Inside every short man is a tall man doubled over in pain.
It is better to copulate than never.
It looks like blind screaming hedonism won out.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
It’s amazing how mature wisdom resembles being too tired.
It’s an ill wind that blows no good.
It’s bad luck to be superstitious.
It’s better to have a horrible ending than to have horrors without end.
It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.
It’s not just reality that matters.
It’s not over till it’s over.
It’s not what you say in your argument, it’s how loud you say it.
It’s not when you get up, but when you get down.
It’s okay to laugh in the bedroom, but don’t point.
It’s only a game until you lose.
It’s only a hobby… only a hobby… only a
It’s only fun if you can get in trouble.
It’s only hopeless if you walk away.
It’s the empty can that makes the most noise.
It’s the squeaky wheel that gets the grease.
It’s who we don’t say no to that defines who we are.
Its hard to get a “head” in the world…
Just because the past runs you doesn’t mean you can run from the future.
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and the world laughs louder.
Laugh and the world thinks you’re an idiot.
Laugh at your problems, everyone else does.
Let he who has no stones cast the first sin.
Life has a lot of undocumented features.
Life is a bowl of spaghetti O’s. They’re all zeros, you just have to eat them up.
Life is cheap. It’s the accessories that kill you.
Life is complex. It has real and imaginary parts.
Life is full of little surprises.
Life is just one of those things.
Life is like a package from the Unabomber… you never know what you’re gonna get
Life is like being thrown into a bed of roses. You get to smell the roses and feel the thorns.
Life is like… an analogy.
Life is recursive.
Life is too important to be taken seriously.
Life is too short to drink cheap beer.
Life isn’t weird; it’s the people in it.
Life’s a beach, and then you drown.
Life’s a trip and then you run out of Travelers’ Checks.
Life’s biggest question is whether or not you’re happy - not with others, but with yourself.
Life’s like raisin bran. Few raisins and lots of bran.
Love is blind; marriage is the eye-opener.
Love isn’t love until you give it away.
Love thine enemies…it really pisses them off.
LSD melts in your mind, not in your hands.
Make hay while the sun shines.
Man loves little and often, woman much and rarely.
Mankind is naturally evil, society inhibits it.
Many a family tree needs trimming.
Many hands make light work.
Men are like toilets: the good ones are taken, the rest are full of shit.
Moderation is good, but boring.
Money can’t buy everything. That’s what credit cards are for.
Money can’t buy happiness, but allows a choice of misery.
Money can’t buy happiness… but it sure makes misery a lot easier to live with.
Money can’t buy love. But it CAN rent a very close imitation.
Money makes the world go around. Love just barely keeps it from blowing up.
Money won’t buy happiness, but it will get a dinner date.
Money won’t buy happiness, but it’s a great down payment.
Most people deserve each other.
Murphy’s law only fails when you try to demonstrate it.
Nature abhors a vacuum.
Nature abhors second order differential equations.
Nice guys don’t finish nice.
No amount of careful planning will ever replace dumb luck.
No job is so simple that is can’t be done wrong.
No matter how much you do, you’ll never do enough.
No matter what goes wrong, it will probably look right.
No matter where you go; you’re there.
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
No one is perfect, but some of us are closer than others.
Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.
Nobody gets out of the Bermuda Triangle. Not even for lunch.
Nobody notices when things go right.
Nostalgia is okay but not what it used to be.
Nothing cures insomnia like the realization that it’s time to get up.
Nothing ever goes away.
Nothing is illegal until you get caught.
Nothing is so simple that it can’t get screwed up.
Nothing is wrong with you that reincarnation can’t cure.
Old age and treachery will beat youth and enthusiasm.
Old hippies never die, they just flashback!
Old musicians don’t die… they just decompose.
Old soldiers never die. Young ones do.
Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse.
One good turn gets most of the blankets.
One on-topic post a day keeps the moderator at bay
Only those who attempt the absurd will achieve the impossible.
Open mouth, insert foot, echo internationally.
Opposites attract.
Out of sight, out of mind.
Part-time musicians are semiconductors.
People have one thing in common: they are all different.
People who live in glass houses… shouldn’t.
People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.
People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
Philosophers can be divided into two groups: those who divide philosophers into two groups, and those who don’t.
Power corrupts; absolute power corrupts absolutely.
Practice makes perfeckt.
Predestination was doomed from the start.
Pure drivel tends to drive away ordinary drivel.
Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.
Religions change, but beer and wine remain.
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